Meanwhile, At the Box Office...

I seem to do this everytime I post but another apology is in order. I haven't posted on the blog in, well... It's been nearly two weeks. Admittedly, I've been busy with university work but I should still be posting more often. It's probably about time I let you all know what I've been watching lately as well, but I'm thinking I should finish Kairo before I do that (I fell asleep watching it because I had done an all-nighter the night before). Sigh...

So, as most of you (well, those of you who know me) will know that I'm a poor student and never get the chance to go to the cinemas. I have to wait until movies hit DVD in New Zealand. That means, despite all the buzz on Twitter and how much it has made at the Box Office, I will have to wait until The Avengers is released on DVD here until I can finally see it. I'll tell ya what, with all the hype surrounding it, it's been hard trying not to think about it (which I've failed to do).

The same goes for Cabin in the Woods. Obviously the film hasn't been released here yet but with all the buzz around it on Twitter, etc, it's been difficult trying to avoid spoilers and all that jazz.

Anyway, has anyone seen the success of The Avengers at the Box Office? That film has broken records and as of today has made $1,209,669,000 worldwide. I'm not even kidding you.

Now, I don't have a problem with this. How could you, anyway? From what I've heard the film deserves its success and there's little wonder why it has done so well. However, what really grinds my gears is the fact that the MPAA are meanwhile bitching about the fact that piracy is 'destroying Hollywood'.

I suppose I should make it clear that I don't pirate movies. Before you make assumptions, this is not because I think it's hurting the film industry because it isn't and that's a fact. Anyone who tries to tell you otherwise either doesn't know what they're talking about or works for the MPAA themselves. The reason I don't download is because I don't think it's worth watching a film on your computer. Movies are made with the intention that they will be consumed in the cinemas. Unfortunately, the best I can get is watching new releases on DVD when they come out but that's another story. Plus, I have watched an illegally downloaded film (let's be honest, who hasn't?) and it was of a very poor quality.

Having said all that, the MPAA thinks that Internet piracy is destroying Hollywood and that a campaign such as SOPA - a policy that will censor the Internet and destroy the idea of anonymity - will stop a thriving industry. As we saw the other day, the censoring of The Pirate Bay in Britain increased their traffic fivefold (or something like that).

Not only this, but they continue to make these outrageous claims whilst a film like The Avengers is breaking Box Office records. Seriously.

Anyway, that's just a rant I wanted to get off my chest and it was too long-winded for Twitter.

In other news, has anyone paid much attention to Adam Sandler's new film? I'd heard of it quite a while ago but I saw an Internet short for it the other day and it prompted me to look it up and find out why I shouldn't see it. All I needed was IMDb to confirm my first impression.

That's My Boy which will open in mid June is, according to IMDb, about a guy called Donny (Sandler) who, while still in his teens, knocks his teacher up and has to raise the child as a single parent. This is supposed to be a comedy but if the gender roles were reversed it would be the absolute opposite.

It sickens me that a real situation such as this - a situation that so many teenagers have to deal with every day - can be easily shat out as a mindless comedy. Why is it that this sort of utter shit is acceptable as long as the teenager and single parent is the male. If the teacher was a male and had knocked up one of his female students only for the teen to raise the child as a single mother, this would be a serious film. I am lost for words. Oh wait, no I'm not.

Fuck you again, Hollywood.

Faith in Humanity Restored, and Then Once Again Destroyed - Thoughts on American: The Bill Hicks Story, Candyman, Mulholland Drive, and Pretty Woman

Now, just bear with me here. I'm going to get to what I've been watching soon but I just wanted to start things off with a quote from Bill Hicks.

The world is like a ride at an amusement park, and when you choose to go on it, you think it's real because that's how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down and round and round; it has thrills and chills and it's very brightly coloured and it's very loud and it's fun... for a while. Some people have been on the ride for a long time, and they begin to question: 'Is this real, or is this just a ride?' And other people have remembered, and they come back to us, and they say, 'Hey - don't worry, don't be afraid - EVER - because this is just a ride.' And we... kill those people. HAHAHA! 'Shut him up! We have a lot invested in this ride - SHUT HIM UP! Look at my furrows of worry! Look at my big bank account, and my family! This has to be real!' ... But it's just a ride. And we always kill those good guys who try and tell us this, you ever notice that? And let the demons run amok? Jesus - murdered; Martin Luther King - murdered; Malcolm X - murdered; Ghandi - murdered; John Lennon - murdered; Reagan... wounded, HAHA! But it doesn't matter because: It's just a ride. And we can change it anytime we want. It's only a choice. No effort, no work, no job, no savings of money. A choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love, instead, see all of us as one. Here's what we can do to change the world, right now, to a better ride: Take all that money that we spend on weapons and defense each year and instead spend it feeding and clothing and educating the poor of the world, which it would many times over, NOT ONE HUMAN BEING EXCLUDED, and we could explore space, together, both inner and outer, forever, in peace.

We could learn a lot from the words of Bill Hicks. Of course, I'm more than likely to be biased because not only do I think Bill Hicks was a genius, I cannot for the life of me find a belief or opinion of his that I don't agree with. Having said that, even if you're Christian or a Republican, or against marijuana legalisation, or a fan of Transformers or that show Beauty and the Geek (these are just a few examples that popped into my head by the way), it would be incredibly ignorant of you to toss aside what Bill Hicks has to say.

There is no denying much of what Bill Hicks said can be agreed with no matter what your religious or political views are. Did anyone take Bill's opinions seriously? Well, no one with power anyway. Instead, America elected Bush Puppet Junior. Twice. I'd hate to think how bitter Bill would be if he were still alive today.

But who am I to get preachy on your arse? We're here to talk movies anyway, and talk movies we shall. The point I was getting to was that I recently saw American: The Bill Hicks Story (on 4/20 as a matter of fact) and it restored my faith in humanity. Of course, it encouraged the bitterness inside of me, but it reminded me that I'm not the only one thinking what I'm thinking. It gave me strength.

My strength was lost last night when I watched Pretty Woman. Fuck you again, Hollywood. Anyway, here's what I've been watching.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

American: The Bill Hicks Story

I must admit that I don't have any clue as to how to review a documentary but I thought I should give it a go anyway. The biography is about the life of the comedian's comedian Bill Hicks, which came out a decade and a half after his death.

It's full of love, laughter, truth, drugs, and dick jokes. Not only is is a great documentary for fans of Bill Hicks, but it is also a great starting point for newcomers. I'd say it's label as a documentary is debatable, but it's a fantastic eulogy.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Candyman

Candyman is another one of those horror films I had heard so much about but still had yet to see. Having now done so, I understand why it is regarded as one of the best horror films of the '90s. Not only is it visually entertaining, but it has an intelligent social commentary.

Of course, it also conatins all the right ingredients to satisfy the gore-hounds, as the film goes to some pretty gory places. That being said, the films is in need of some editing and to be honest, I found myself looking at the time more than once.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mulholland Dr.

Much like Lost Highway, David Lynch's Mulholland Dr. is one fucked up and confusing film. We've all seen it before; a Lynch film full of cretinous hobgoblins and zombies. The camera swoops majestically with the characters as they explore the eerie depths of darkness. It's art, but where's the line between art and a total shit pile?

The problem both Lost Highway and Mulholland Dr. have is that they're incredibly laborious to watch. Everything plays out like it's a daytime soap opera. From the delivery to the at times cringe-worthy score, it's hard to watch without letting out an audible groan. Having said that, it's deeply satisfying to see Billy Ray Cyrus cop one on the face.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Pretty Woman

I can't really say much about Pretty Woman that hasn't already been said before. Nice rich guy conveniently picks up prostitute without actually meaning to, he pays said prostitute $3,000 to stay with him for a week and then said prostitute falls in love with nice rich guy. Ain't Hollywood wonderful?

It's one of those films that'll make you angrier the longer you watch. Having said that, I have to make it clear that the only reason I watched this steaming pile was because it's one of the films we're studying in one of my film courses.

Really though, the film says Roberts' character becomes a better person when she scores a rich guy to leech off of and learns to cry at the opera. No amount of gagging will successfully describe this Hollywood movie.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Righto, I'll hopefully be back on the blog soon. I've got a lot of essays to write and am therefore swamped with work to do for my university courses. Nevertheless, I've got a rant brewing about the MPAA and The Avengers so if I'm not back by the weekend, I'll talk to you next week. Until then, cinephiles.

From Tokyo to Paris - Thoughts on Enter the Void, Midnight in Paris, Ice Age, and The 40 Year Old Virgin

Since I last talked to you, I've got a few more films under my belt, but those I'll get to in a second.

You may remember a post from the first of this month about the fact that The Cabin in the Woods wasn't getting a theatrical release in Australia or New Zealand. Well, since then, developments have been made on the matter. Village Roadshow Limited posted a new bulletin on their Twitter feed regarding the matter. Apparently, due to public outcry from horror fans and cinephiles all over the world, The Cabin in the Woods will be hitting the big screen in both Melbourne and Sydney for a limited season.

 

While this may by good news for these city centres, it does leave the rest of Australia and the entirety of New Zealand in the dark until the film is released on DVD (a date that still seems to be unconfirmed). I mean, I'm not complaining because our original complaints got noticed, but it still surprises me.

Anyway, I guess it's time to dive into what I've been watching. As always, I'll be tweeting away on Twitter and I'll probably be back on the blog later on in the week. Until then, cinephiles.

Enter the Void

Gaspar Noé's 2009 psychedelic thriller Enter the Void is a trip. In visual terms, the psychedelic imagery pulsates, lit by the extravagant fluorescence of Tokyo's nightlife. Anyone who has seen the film has to admit that the dazzling visual effects make the film spectacular to watch, but is it enjoyable?

Your experience of it may differ from mine but I found it beautiful to watch and I think Gaspar Noé is a genius for having actually filmed his vision. What he wanted to show wasn't easy to capture on screen but he did it successfully, and actually made it look easy.

The problem I do have with the film, however, is the terrible story. The actual story is extraordinarily dull and makes the whole premise get old a lot faster than it should have. By the end of the third act, the film had practically turned into a porno. Not to mention it's nearly three hours in length (way too long).

Midnight in Paris

I'm surprised at how much positive criticism Midnight in Paris received as I find it difficult to look past its major flaw; Owen Wilson. I've always found Wilson to be incredibly irritating to watch, yet I gave him a good chance considering the fact that it's a Woody Allen film. Sadly, the actor never redeemed himself.

Firstly, it was a mistake casting someone other than Allen himself to play the socially awkward writer. That sort of character is Woody Allen all over, yet the role was given to someone else. Not only was it someone else, but this 'someone else' was Owen Wilson. The casting crew should hag their heads in shame.

Yes, the film is a loving embrace of Paris, of art and of life itself, but the script is clunky and every line is delivered like it was a high school stage play. Having said all that, it does have its moments. It's just unfortunate it was so laborious to watch.

Ice Age

There's not really much to say about Dreamworks' 2002 money-maker other than the fact that it's not as cute as it looks or funny as it sounds. Yes, the story is both hear-warming and heart-breaking, but that's all it has going for it.

The animation is amateurish even though it was made ten years ago. Admittedly, I can't imagine ice being an easy thing to draw, but the characters didn't look like animals; they looked like stuffed toys. Especially Sid. Oh, and despite Sid being the clown, he could've been a lot funnier.

The 40 Year Old Virgin

Despite its cheap and lowbrow premise, The 40 Year Old Virgin is actually full of laughs and speaks to the inner geek in all of us. The script is laden with profanity yet it stands out from gross-out comedies because of how it deals with the main theme.

Of course, the film features Apatow regulars like Seth Rogen and Paul Rudd, but the star is Steve Carell, a perfectly casted, socially awkward geek. He's a great fit for the role, but it is a shame that this is the peak of his career. Since this film, the comedy actor hasn't shown off what he is capable of.

This film is both truly dirty and truly romantic, which is a combination that's hard to pull off. Trust Judd Apatow to successfully tackle such a project. It is also very rewatchable so it's a must-have for fans of the film and/or Apatow fans.

Top Five Opening Credit Sequences

Wow, it seems like ages since I last wrote on the blog so I thought it was about time for another top five list. Trust me, I know I've been slack lately but I haven't had the time to see as many films as I would like to. Nevertheless, this week I might be able to sneak a few movies in here and there. I have to watch Candyman and Old Boy for my university courses for a start. Plus, I have to catch up on some that I've missed (Mulholland Dr., Peeping Tom, Ginger Snaps, The Evil Dead and The Evil Dead 2 to name but a few).

I was having a little trouble coming up with a top five list but as soon as the idea surfaced, I just knew I had to do it. I recently saw Enter the Void for the first time and despite the dull storyline it was genius in the way it was filmed. On top of this, the opening credit sequence was fantastic in that it puts you in the perfect frame of mind for the rest of the film.

Admittedly, this was a very hard list to curate because every time I thought of a film, I thought of three more. If you'd like to investigate further yourself, IFC have a top fifty list that's a great starting point. On top of this, there's also Art of the Title, which is a great blog covering the subject. You can find a link to it in the side bar to the right of this post.

Having said this, I would like to make a few honourable mentions before I delve into the list. Sometimes the opening credit sequence of any given movie can be beautiful. It can be both artistic and vital in setting up the mood for the rest of the film. A few films I'd like to make reference to would be the Monty Python films for starters. The Life of Brian has a animated sequence animated by no other than Terry Gilliam that's both funny and incredibly whacky - a perfect intro. The Holy Grail also has a fantastic opening. It may be simple but if you look closely, the credits are actually as hilarious as the rest of the film.

David Fincher is also famous for his clever opening credit sequences so it was hard only picking one of his films. Therefore, I'd like to quickly mention Panic Room, Zodiac, and Fight Club. There's not really much to say about these part from the fact that they are all beautiful.

Two others I'd like to quickly mention before I dive in are The Player and Catch Me If You Can. The Player's opening credits may not be about the credits themselves, but I thought it was worth a mention because the entire scene is shot in one take. It's hard enough shooting such a long scene in one take but for it to be one long tracking shot proves talent. I don't have much to say about the opening credits to Catch Me If You Can but I've always liked them so it was worth a mention.

Oh by the way, if you click any of the previous or following links, they will take you clips of each repsective sequence. Anyway, without further ado, here's my top five:

1. Enter the Void: As I said earlier, the opeing credits for Enter the Void sets up the rest of the film perfectly. It's bright, colourful, and heaven for anyone under the influence. You must be warned, you shouldn't watch this film - or the above clip for that matter - if you are epileptic.

2. Se7en: Of David Fincher's filmography, I chose Se7en's opening credits because it does exactly what the opening credits do in Enter the Void; they set up the mood the for rest of the film. Se7en is a very eerie film and it's a bonus for the audience to get a glimpse of the creepiness that is yet to come.

3. Watchmen: I don't really have much to say about this one apart from the fact that it's pretty awesome to watch. It has its factual and historical problems but it's still pretty cool. It actually made me realise I need to see the film again sometime soon. In fact, I have the graphic novel sitting on my desk that I have yet to read.

4. Lord of War: This is another one of those sequences that's just really cool to watch. Not only is it clever and interesting, but it gives you all the information you need to know on how a bullet is made, right from the beginning to the point where it is used to kill.

5. Zombieland: It may not be the best song in the world but you can't deny it's the right choice for setting up the rest of the film. I had a bit of a thing for Zombieland a few years ago, and the opening credits had something to do with it. Not only is it stunning in 1080p, but the slow motion makes it what it is.

Say What? - The Cabin in the Woods Won't Get a Theatrical Release in Australia or New Zealand

A few days ago now Village Roadshow Limited announced on their Twitter feed that The Cabin in the Woods was not going to receive a theatrical release in Australia or New Zealand. You can probably imagine how the Twitter community reacted to this news; let's just say most of the reactions weren't favourable of the announcement.

Take Scott Weinberg's first reaction to the news for example. Of course, if you're not following Scott on Twitter then you really should be but he brought up somegood points about international film distribution. Why is it that international distribution relies too heavily on US Box Office results? The answer: money.

Ideally, international distribution wouldn't rely on what happens at the US Box Office. Sadly, it does, and it's not something that's going to change anytime soon. Despite this being the case, the fact that The Cabin in the Woods will be released straight to DVD in the countries like Australia and New Zealand is still quite astounding. It got a theatrical release in Croatia, Iceland and Lithuania for crying out loud.

It's not as if The Cabin in the Woods is even a 'B' movie. Let's be honest, most 'B' horror movies usually get sent straight to the DVD shelves as theatrical releases don't generate the sort of income distributors want from such films. This film is not in the same boat. It's a film written by Joss Whedon (writer and director of The Avengers), directed by Drew Goddard (writer of Cloverfield), and stars some big names (Chris Hemsworth and Kristen Connolly among others).

It's not as if Village Roadshow are a small film distributor either. They should know what will and won't make money. I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure The Cabin in the Woods would make enough from the amount of horror fans wanting to see this on the big screen.

Admittedly, I don't often get the chance to go to the theatres so this news doesn't really affect me (ticket prices are way too expensive, but that's a rant for another day). Even though I probably would've seen it on DVD anyway, here's a proposition: There's enough public outcry on the 'direct to DVD' news, right? There's enough demand from horror fans in Australasia, right? How about select cinemas around Australia and New Zealand show a few screenings of The Cabin in the Woods for the fanboys, even if it's just a few midnight screenings? It's a win-win situation because then the horror fans are happy and Village Roadshow still get the revenue they want from DVD sales.

Anyway, it's just an idea. In the meantime there's a petition floating round the web you can sign to convince Village Roadshow Limited to release the film theatrically. The petition has already reached its goal but the more people that sign it the more it proves that the public demand for a theatrical release is large.